Madame Trashion

There was an unusual buzz in the bird’s clearing. Animals from the whole forest gathered to meet Madame Fashion who was said to be a famous fashion expert. Informational posters had been hanging in the forest since three days. They advertised that Miss Vixen was offering to give everyone fashion advice taken straight from Paris and Milano. Everyone who would come to the meeting would be able to buy shoes, dresses and scarves from the best designers. Deer, does and even wild boars, attracted by the posters, were making their way through the crowd of animals to get as close to the stage as possible.

– Are you coming? – Tola, feeling very excited, asked her friends. She had put on a huge hat and big sunglasses especially for the meeting with Vixen. The glasses were so big that they were constantly sliding from her nose.
– To the fashion lesson? – asked Rascal ironically. – What if she told me to take off my old neckerchief and replace it with a tie? No, thanks, I’ll stay here – he added, amused.
– I’m not going there either – hooted Pola.
– Eh… you don’t know what is good. Whatever, I’m going there! I’ll be the most famous fashion creator among kittens! I’ve always dreamed about it! – cried Tola and ran towards the clearing.

Pola and Rascal shook their heads with resignation and went on playing draughts.

When the sound of a trumpet echoed in the clearing, the vixen came out onstage and all animals that had gathered around greeted her with applause. Everyone was in awe of her silk clothes covered with lace and frills.

– KMy dear, thank you all for coming! You have an unusual opportunity to be the audience of a unique fashion show. After that, I will advise you on how to combine silk with lace, how to properly match colours and – she paused, glancing at the kitten – And tell you if such big sunglasses look good with that huge hat… –she added, ironically.

Tola turned pale. Did Vixen mean that this combination doesn’t look good? What an embarrassment! Abashed, Tola lowered her head so that no one could notice that Madame Fashion was talking about her…

During the whole day animals presented various clothes on the stage and Miss Vixen was talking about what is trendy and what is not (or in other words, “passé”), what is elegant and what is out of place. Animals were giving a big applause and praising the vixen.

– Well done! – called the hare Nathaniel.
– Beautiful! – echoed the hedgehog Igor.
– Please, tell us more! – cried the crowd.

Waiters were handing out beverages in single-use plastic cups to help the audience withstand the whole day in the sun. And because there wasn’t any bin in the clearing, cups were discreetly dropped on the ground. At the end of the day, everyone could buy clothes brought straight from Paris. Miss Vixen’s assistant was packing clothes, first putting them into a small plastic bag and then into another bigger one which he was decorating with large bows with sequins. Both those who had bought a small neckerchief and those who had bought a suit were leaving with huge packages, almost as big as themselves.

– Look! – called Tola, really excited to see Pola and Rascal standing by a tree. She opened her bag and took out a tiny violet neckerchief. She put it on and smiled at her friends.
– Now, don’t I look like a film star? Madame Fashion told me that I look gorgeous! – said Tola, still excited.

– Rather like a mandarin duck – answered amused Rascal
– Or a parrot – added Pola, laughing.
– Phew! You are just fashion laymen. Tomorrow is another lesson; you will be surprised when you’ll see me after that!
– Are you kidding… It’s not ending today? – asked Rascal, truly surprised.
– Do you really think that one can become someone great only in one day… – asked Tola, hurt by what Rascal said. She turned around and run back home.

During the whole week animals attended Madam Fashion’s lessons and then stayed to buy clothes and accessories. On the third day, they brought all their everyday clothes and disposed of the ones that Miss Vixen described as unfashionable.
Maya the hare had to throw out her favourite red purse, fawn Stanley disposed of his black-red tie he had been given for birthday and squirrel Natalie threw out her beloved warm gloves. Well, the advice of Madame should be taken to heart, after all, she is the fashion designer, thought all the animals, getting rid of their clothes.

In the beginning, Rascal and Pola were indifferent, watching everything with growing amusement. But after a few days, and after many plastic cups fell into Pola’s hollow and huge plastic bags with bows made it difficult to walk around and play football, the friends became irritated.

– We have to do something with this mess or else I’ll go crazy! – barked Rascal.
– I have an idea… – said the owl.

Pola quickly phoned her aunt Inga, who was quite loony but knew everything about fashion. Pola told her what was happening in the forest and asked if it was normal to produce so much litter during fashion shows. In the end, she mentioned the name of Madame Fashion…

– OOoh la la! Madame Fashion is in your forest?! What news! Oh, I have to pay you a visit! – she cried into the phone. –  She’s the greatest French fashion designer,’ the aunt squealed in surprise.
– Now we’ve had it! – cried Pola, disappointed. –Instead of help, we’re going to have another enthusiast of Miss Vixen…
– Ah, where is she?! Where’s Madame Fashion? – cried aunt Inga, who showed up in Pola’s hollow at 6 o’clock in the morning. Her feathers, died pink, and huge glasses looked even more peculiar than Tola’s dappled neckerchief.
– Hi, aunt Inga, nice to see you… – Pola, a bit sleepy, greeted her guest. – I think you’ll easily find the way to the clearing, just follow the litter… – she added, sounding resigned.
– Oh, my dear, you must be joking! You need to come with me! You can’t miss Madame’s fashion show! – ordered aunt Inga and pulled Pola out of the tree hollow.

To reach the clearing sooner, the two owls decided to fly over the cups and plastic bags. When they reached the clearing, Pola showed her aunt Miss Vixen standing on the stage.

– Aunt Inga, this is your great fashion designer, Madame Fashion… but in fact, she should be called Madame Trashion.
– Where is she, where?! – asked aunt Inga, very excited.
– Well… right here, on the stage… – said Pola, pointing at Miss Vixen.
– But where, my dear?! I only see one of her assistants, dressed really distastefully, by the way. Where is Madame? – she asked, upset.
– Wait, what…? – Pola was surprised. – The vixen on stage is Madame Trashion, there is nobody else there. I bet she wears her glasses only as an accessory, but in fact she’s totally blind – thought Pola, resigned.

– No, no, my dear, the person on the stage is cheating on you! – yelled aunt Inga. – I’ve met Madame and I’m sure she looks completely different.

Aunt Inga, very annoyed, flew onto the stage and landed right in front of the surprised vixen.

– Parle vous Fanceis? [Parlay voo frahseh?] – she asked in French.
The vixen didn’t answer…
– Hablais Italiano? – The aunt tried to talk to the vixen once again, this time in Italian.
The vixen was still looking at the pink owl with astonishment.

– My dear animals! – The aunt talked to the crowd that gathered in front of the stage. – TThis vixen doesn’t know French or Italian. The real Madame Fashion speaks fluently both of these languages…
– Oooh! Whaaat?! – everyone yelled in surprise.
– ‘In addition, fashion shows are stylish and everyone takes care of the environment, we use paper or cotton bags when they are needed. And here – look around you, we’re in the middle of a rubbish dump! Do you really think this is trendy? This is not Madame Fashion but Madame Trashion! – yelled aunt Inga.

– That’s right! – the hare Nathaniel replied very angrily.
– She’s right! That’s true! – added the fawn Stanley.
– I felt that something was not right – echoed voices from every corner of the clearing.

Before the aunt turned around to look at Miss Vixen, she had already fled from the stage. Only her small tail glimpsed between trees far away in the forest.

– ‘What are we going to do now? – the hare Maya asked sadly.
– We’ve been cheated! – cried out the hedgehog Igor.

– Our clearing is a rubbish dump! What have we done… – lamented the hedgehog Bart, the fawn Stanley and the squirrel Natalie, together all feeling very miserable.
– My dear, there’s nothing to be worry about, after all, we have UPCYCLING! – said aunt Inga.
– Up… what? – asked animals because they didn’t know what this word means.
– Ooh la la – Aunt Inga rolled her eyes. – Fortunately, I’m here today. Upcycling ! What is truly fashionable in the world these days, is creating clothes on the basis of recycling, using scraps of old material, plastic or metal. It is all about the reuse of things which before were viewed as trash.
– Ooh! – a murmur came from the crowd.
– But this will definitely be ugly… – Tola and the small hedgehog Bart said shyly.
– And old, while we wanted something new and trendy – added the squirrel Natalie.
– If Titiana Inglis or Matt&Nat are not fashionable, then I have no idea who is – oanswered aunt Inga… – Now quickly, collect litter and separate it so it is grouped into four piles: one with paper, one with plastic, one with metal and one with the remaining materials. I will show you something in a minute.

The aunt sat down on the stage and started to choose materials from what the other animals had brought her. Then, she began to cut, iron, paint, and make holes in them. After two hours, the clearing was tidied up and aunt Inga started to present handmade dresses, trousers, bags, belts and neckerchiefs. Everything was made from only the scraps found in the clearing.

– My dear, the trick is not to dispose of everything that is old and then buy new things. The trick is to add a tiny knick-knack to make something old regain its former beauty.

Aunt Inga folded one of the dresses, wrapped it up with a blade of grass, decorated it with a clover and gave this pretty package to Tola standing in front of the stage.
Several weeks later, the news spread around the forest that Madame Trashion had littered yet another forest before she was caught by the environmental police…